Legal

Terms of Use

The short version is at the top, and it is the honest one.

In Plain Language

Read this part if you read nothing else

United Bagholding Corporation does not exist. It is a fictional company, invented as a joke, and this website is part of the joke. There is no bag warehouse in Wilmington. There are no divisions, no Board, no employees, and no bags.

$BAGS is a memecoin. It is not a share, not equity, and not a claim on anything. It has no intrinsic value and entitles you to nothing at all. Buying it does not make you a shareholder of anything, whatever this website calls you.

Nothing on this site is financial advice, an offer, a solicitation, or a promise. If any page here reads to you as though it were describing a real company or a real investment, please stop reading it that way. That is the only warning we can give, and we would rather give it plainly at the top of the page than bury it at the bottom.

The rest of this page is written in ordinary language too. The corporate voice used elsewhere on this site is part of the parody. It is not used here.

Terms

1. Acceptance: By using this website you accept these terms. If you do not accept them, please do not use the site. That is the whole of the arrangement between us.
2. The site is a parody: Everything on this site is fiction: the filings, the press releases, the metrics, the annual report, the divisions, the history, and the intern. Documents labeled “Form S-1 (Parody),” “Form 10-Q (Parody),” or similar are not filings. They have not been submitted to, reviewed by, or acknowledged by any regulatory agency, and they never will be. No regulatory seal, mark, or registration appears anywhere on this site, because none exists and none may be inferred.
3. No affiliation with anyone: United Bagholding Corporation is not affiliated with, sponsored by, endorsed by, or connected to Robinhood or to any other company, exchange, broker, or agency. Robinhood Chain is named on this site only to identify the network the token exists on. Any resemblance between this fictional company and a real company, filing, or person is unintended.
4. Not financial advice: Nothing on this site is investment, financial, legal, or tax advice, or a recommendation to buy, sell, or hold anything. This site makes no statement about price anywhere, and it will not. If you want advice, get it from somebody licensed to give it. That is not this website, and it is not IRVIN.
5. No warranty: This site is provided “as is” and “as available,” without warranty of any kind, express or implied, including any warranty of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, accuracy, or non-infringement. The site may be incomplete, out of date, wrong, or offline.
6. Limitation of liability: To the fullest extent the law allows, the operators of this site are not liable for any loss or damage arising out of your use of the site, or out of anything you choose to do with $BAGS. Digital assets are volatile and can lose all of their value. If you spend money on a memecoin you may lose all of it. That decision is yours alone, and you make it without us.
7. No relationship is created: Using this site creates no relationship between you and the Corporation, because the Corporation does not exist. In particular: no shareholder relationship, no client relationship, no fiduciary duty, no employment, and no partnership. The words “shareholder,” “investor,” and “registry” are used throughout this site as jokes. $BAGS confers no ownership, voting, dividend, governance, or profit rights of any kind, and no such rights are planned.
8. What we ask of you: Do not use this site unlawfully. Do not represent United Bagholding Corporation as a real company. Do not use anything published here — the filings, the crest, the wording, the format — to persuade anybody that they are buying a security, a share, or a claim on anything. The joke only works while everybody is in on it.
9. Links and addresses: Where this site links to somewhere else — an explorer, a chart, an exchange — that destination is not ours, we do not control it, and these terms do not apply to it. Verify any contract address independently, from more than one source, before you do anything with it. People do publish fake ones.
10. Intellectual property: The text, crest, and layout of this site belong to its operators. You are welcome to quote and share them. You are not welcome to reuse them to impersonate a real business or to mislead anybody.
11. Changes to these terms: These terms may change. The version on this page is the one in force. There is no archive of prior versions, and we will not pretend otherwise.
12. Severability: If any provision of these terms is held unenforceable, the remaining provisions stay in force.
13. Contact: Questions about these terms can be sent through Contact. How this site handles information is described at Privacy, in the same plain register as this page.